Caregivers often devote so much time and energy to caring for a loved one that they fail to take adequate care of themselves. This problem has become so prevalent that there is a term for it: caregiver burnout.
If you serve as the caregiver in your family, you must understand and recognize the signs that you may be trying to do too much. Start by asking yourself the following questions:
- Are you tired even after a full night’s sleep?
- Are you catching an unusually large number of colds?
- Do you feel like your entire life revolves around caregiving but you derive little satisfaction from it?
- Are you frequently tense and find it extremely hard to relax?
- Are you often impatient with the person in your care?
- Do you frequently feel helpless, perhaps even hopeless?
If your answer to some of these questions is yes, and you didn’t feel this way until you began serving as caregiver, you may be approaching burnout. Here are some steps you can take to manage this difficult situation:
- Learn as much as you can about your loved one’s illness and how to care for it. Know what might be coming, rather than constantly being caught off guard.
- Know your limits regarding the amount of time and effort you can give your loved one. Be sure to convey these limits to doctors and other family members.
- Acknowledge and accept your feelings. Anger, fear, resentment, guilt, grief, helplessness… all of these emotions are common among caregivers.
- Ask our office for resources, such as referrals to care managers or funding for home health aides.
- Talk to people about your feelings. Confiding in friends and family members can provide a sense of relief and help you overcome a sense of isolation.
This last step is extremely important. Remember that you are not alone. You must do whatever it takes to avoid feeling isolated. Support groups can be found online, through your physician, and from organizations associated with your loved one’s health issues. Your local senior center, as well as Old Colony Elderly Services and South Shore Elder Services, are good places to start.
Until next time, take care….
If I have created a plan for you and you are happy with it, the best compliment you can give me is to recommend my firm to family and friends. As you know, everyone should have an estate plan.